Here’s a quick culinary quiz for anyone who spent their college years racking up enough student loan debt to re-decorate a corporate CEO’s office bathroom while being forced to subsist on food so vile it would make Upton Sinclair hurl from the grave.
If, back in your hazy, beer-sodden, poverty-stricken Halcyon days you happened to be walking across campus with the remnants of last night’s ramen-and-potted meat casserole slowly destroying your gastro-intestinal tract and you saw this hopping by would you:
A. Let out an “Awww, how cute!” in hopes of looking sensitive enough to score a date with any nearby hot chicks?
B. Form a student group and picket the dean’s office with a petition drive to demand full protection and political autonomy for all exploited campus-area rabbits, again in hopes of looking suitably sensitive and passionate enough to score a date with any nearby hot chicks?
C. Grab that plump, delicious little bastard, stuff him in your backpack and accept the fact you’re never gonna score a date with a hot chick, anyway?
If you chose A or B and it actually worked, I envy you. However, if you chose C you may not want to attend the University of Victoria, British Columbia. unless you plan on developing a long-term relationship with your hand.
From the story (via the NY Times Dot Earth blog):
_A description in a university newsletter of how to kill, clean and cook the rabbits running wild on the University of Victoria’s grounds has animal rights groups hopping mad. The article — “Cook up a pot of Rabbit Restoration Stew” — appeared in Essence, a newsletter put out by environmental studies students.
“Kill a nice fat UVic rabbit,” writes Abe Lloyd, a graduate student, who told the Times Colonist _he eats about one UVic bunny a month. “Bait it in, pin it to the ground, grab it by its hind legs and whack the back of its head hard against the ground, killing it instantly.”
“Be discrete, however,” he warns, since “some people don’t enjoy the sight of a dead rabbit.”
_The possibility students might follow the advice horrifies Erika Paul, a B.C. SPCA animal protection officer who wants the university to immediately tell students that killing or hurting the rabbits is illegal and inhumane.
“They could be looking at charges under the Criminal Code or under the B.C. SPCA Act for causing unnecessary pain and suffering,” she said. “It’s outrageous.”
Bravo to grad student Abe Lloyd! Let’s all give him a (purely platonic) hand. I admire anyone who so willfully and utterly destroys his college social life for principle and protein. Here’s hoping he finds a nice carnivorous girl with which to share a stew.